But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
