You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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