Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Randomize
