Are we in a gay sports bar?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
