My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
