that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
