We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
