if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize