i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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