She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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