the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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