There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
