What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
i drank out of a bidet.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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