My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
