Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
