What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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