took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
