You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
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