Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
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