smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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