How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
