Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
