this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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