Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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