Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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