Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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