This house was built for laser tag.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
