Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
