You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize