Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
