oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
