i need an iv and a liver transplant
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize