I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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