Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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