so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
