I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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