Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision http://tfl.nu/hkka
  Replies (44) Good night (3362) Bad night (1106)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh. http://tfl.nu/mtmx
  Replies (12) Good night (851) Bad night (2085)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face. http://tfl.nu/puwv
  Replies (30) Good night (1261) Bad night (4050)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides. http://tfl.nu/4pjs
  Replies (26) Good night (4437) Bad night (738)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day. http://tfl.nu/vo27
  Replies (24) Good night (6553) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate. http://tfl.nu/i871
  Replies (10) Good night (1117) Bad night (2782)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways. http://tfl.nu/jmoy
  Replies (3) Good night (2703) Bad night (748)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video http://tfl.nu/x1wo
  Replies (9) Good night (1404) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?

  (1-574): View more from Indiana

  Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for? (1-574): Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina. http://tfl.nu/l0nz
  Replies (18) Good night (2239) Bad night (713)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people. http://tfl.nu/w1ks
  Replies (33) Good night (3053) Bad night (957)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself http://tfl.nu/7j3v
  Replies (4) Good night (887) Bad night (677)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered. http://tfl.nu/js85
  Replies (5) Good night (691) Bad night (1029)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place. http://tfl.nu/mphg
  Replies (10) Good night (1256) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob. http://tfl.nu/q4zv
  Replies (14) Good night (1474) Bad night (378)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed http://tfl.nu/3k2a
  Replies (10) Good night (761) Bad night (450)

Randomize