Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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