There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Randomize
