Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize