did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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