I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
This baby is an asshole
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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