It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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