Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
