I want to stick my p in your. b.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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