I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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