Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Dignity is for republicans.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
