the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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