The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize