a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
