Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(417): View more from Missouri

You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?

(573): View more from Missouri

You can't be serious.

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(417): You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right? (573): You can't be serious. http://tfl.nu/cmch

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(845): View more from New York

We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?

(1-845): View more from New York

Who won mens moguls?

(845): View more from New York

That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.

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(845): We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously? (1-845): Who won mens moguls? (845): That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude. http://tfl.nu/8mik

Replies (63) Good night (6544) Bad night (2058)
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(904): View more from Florida

bring the vodka.

(1-904): View more from Florida

i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?

(904): View more from Florida

we are.

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(904): bring the vodka. (1-904): i thought we were going to mcdonalds..? (904): we are. http://tfl.nu/1144

Replies (32) Good night (9516) Bad night (994)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays

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(908): It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays http://tfl.nu/4h3r

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(951): View more from California

Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.

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(951): Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper. http://tfl.nu/tu64

Replies (14) Good night (4585) Bad night (924) Order T-Shirt
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(701): View more from North Dakota

For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.

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(701): For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza. http://tfl.nu/ui1g

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(845): View more from New York

He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.

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(845): He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver. http://tfl.nu/r9iy

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(330): View more from Ohio

Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy

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(330): Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy http://tfl.nu/16kg

Replies (12) Good night (863) Bad night (2876) Order T-Shirt
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(250): View more from British Columbia

You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor

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(250): You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor http://tfl.nu/35l1

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(607): View more from New York

I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.

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(607): I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex. http://tfl.nu/9fy5

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(519): View more from Ontario

I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex

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(519): I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex http://tfl.nu/b3wh

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore

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(401): um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore http://tfl.nu/seg6

Replies (11) Good night (688) Bad night (2229)
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(940): View more from Texas

Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?

(940): View more from Texas

Is this a story I am going to hate you for?

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(940): Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes? (940): Is this a story I am going to hate you for? http://tfl.nu/tb13

Replies (2) Good night (1730) Bad night (353)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went

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(704): he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went http://tfl.nu/pwu0

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(402): View more from Nebraska

The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"

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(402): The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?" http://tfl.nu/ovas

Replies (11) Good night (539) Bad night (1208)

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