Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize